This Saturday marked another first…it was my wedding anniversary on Saturday, Sept 28. It was a day filled with lots of different emotions. I had anticipated it would be and really wanted to fill my weekend with fun things to help me from dwelling on it…but everything kind of fell through. I spent most of the weekend alone and it was a depressing couple of days. Not so much sad about being divorced, but more just reflecting on the last 17+ years, the lost dreams, the sacrifices I’ve made in the past, the lost years, the unhappy years, and even the happy ones. It’s hard to explain the different emotions. But, I did make it through and I think I’m stronger because of it. I know God doesn’t give us more than we can handle and that everything happens for a reason, but some days, I just wonder how much I’m going to have to take and when he will reveal his even greater plans for me. The hope that someday I can live out some of the dreams I have helps me get through each day.
Monthly Archives: September 2013
Summer was tough. I was releived when Labor Day came, which marks the end of Summer. The end of another season. Normally my favorite season, still is, but this one was hard. So many firsts to get through alone…weekends with no kids/no plans, 4th of July, my birthday, Summer lake days/boating, no summer vacations/camping trips. But, I am happy to say, I did survive it all and glad to have those firsts behind me. Hoping by the time next summer roles around, I can actually look forward to some of those events again and have new and old friends to enjoy them with.
With summer behind us, today marks the start of a new school year, a new season. Fall. Next to summer, fall is my favorite sesason in MN. Love the Indian Days of summer…warm days, cool nights. Sweater weather, bon fires, movie nights. But along with the start of school & fall, I realize there are still more firsts to get through. Again, I’m 99% positive I’ll survive them all. So far, I’ve got a pretty good record of surviving. The key is going to be to take it one day at a time and not look so far ahead and wish time away. That is so much easier said then done, when you are a planner/control freak like I tend to be. I like to have things lined up, know what to expect ahead of time. However, I’m learning that isn’t always best. So, this fall, I will focus on taking one day at a time, living for the day, and enjoying this new season and all the new experiences that it brings me.